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HDDOG RHYMES

>Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss

>but I only slept with you, because I was pissed


>I thought that I could love no other

>Until, that is, I met your brother


>Roses are red, violets are blue,

>Sugar is sweet, and so are you.

>But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead,

>The sugar bowl's empty and so is your head.


>Of loving beauty you float with grace

>If only you could hide your face


>Kind, intelligent, loving and hot

>This describes everything you are not


>I want to feel your sweet embrace

>But don't take that paper bag off of your face


>I love your smile, your face, and your eyes-

>####, I'm good at telling lies!


>My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:

>Marrying you screwed up my life


>I see your face when I am dreaming

>That's why I always wake up screaming


>My love you take my breath away

>What have you stepped in to smell this way


>My feelings for you no words can tell

>Except for maybe "go to hell"


>What inspired this amorous rhyme?

>Two parts vodka, one part lime








Summer Classes for Women at
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
By Sat., August 28, 2010

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1
Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM..

Class 2
Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
At 7:00 PM

Class 6
How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Can a   Bath  Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
How to  Parallel   Park  In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield .
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined  

Class 12
How to Shop by Yourself.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Upon completion of ANY of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

Send this to all your guy friends for the best chuckle of their day...  
And to all your gal friends who have a sense of humor!